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General Discussion>Everyday colloquialisms
jjirons69 08:47 AM 06-12-2013
My dad is king of colloquialisms. Everything was hot as something, cold as something, wet as something, etc., you get the drift. I grew up around that and I use a lot of them on a daily basis myself, so I thought it's be fun to see the ones you guys say or like. That's right, guys, as colloquialisms seem to be a guy thing. Some of my personal favorites, most of which I use from time to time and some I often hear. Posting here might give me some new ones. :-)

Hard as Chinese algebra.
High as a Georgia pine.
F***ed up as Hogan's goat.
Hot as the hinges of hell.
Hot as Hades.
Cold as a landlord's heart.
Cold as a witches tit in a brass bra.
Cold as a gravediggers a$$.
Warm as in your mother's arms.
Lost as last year's Easter egg.
F***ed up as a can of worms.
Tight as a hat band.
Quick as grease through a goose.
Slick as owl $hit.
Sweating like a whore in church.
Bleeding like a stuck pig.
Horny as a two d*ck goat.
Dumb as a bag of hammers.
Dumb as a box of rocks.
He's a couple cards short of a full deck.
His elevator doesn't go to the top floor.
Off like a prom dress.
Heading out like a newborn.
Busy as a one-armed paper hanger.
Lord willing and the creek don't rise.


I'll post more as I hear them or they come to mind.
[Reply]
kelmac07 09:00 AM 06-12-2013
F***ed up like a football bat.
Finer than frogs hair, split ways.
He's a couple cans short of a six-pack.
Hotter than a fresh f***ed fox in a forest fire.
Busier than a one legged man in an a$$ kicking contest.
[Reply]
ColdCuts 09:03 AM 06-12-2013
Great list, Jamie!

F***ed up as Hogan's goat?! :-) I'd love to hear the origin of that one.

Here's a couple:

Dumb as a bowl of hair.
Slower than molasses in the wintertime.
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T.G 09:07 AM 06-12-2013
What a Nickerson.
Crazier than a shithouse rat.
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elderboy02 09:09 AM 06-12-2013
Harder to find than teeth on a hen.
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G G 09:10 AM 06-12-2013
Drunk as Cooter Brown.
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czerbe 09:10 AM 06-12-2013
Going down like a prom date
Serious as a heart attack
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AdamJoshua 09:11 AM 06-12-2013
Lights are on but nobody's home.
A couple cards short of a full deck.
Not the brightest bulb in the box.
Has a face for radio.

Hockey Specific:

I'd trade ________ for a bag of pucks.
[Reply]
sevans105 09:12 AM 06-12-2013
Better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick

Better than a peck on the head with a sharp rock

(Grandpa was a bit of a pessimist.)
[Reply]
Mr B 09:17 AM 06-12-2013
Couple Fries short of a Happy Meal.

She looks like 40 miles of Bad Road.
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MajorCaptSilly 09:18 AM 06-12-2013
Sillier than MCS
The lights are on but the furnace filter needs replaced
Dumber than a box of boxes
More uncomfortable than Jerry Springer in a room with normal people
As supercilious as John Mayer


MCS
[Reply]
ColdCuts 10:33 AM 06-12-2013
This'll kill a couple hours if you let it.

http://www.idiomconnection.com/
[Reply]
Garbandz 10:46 AM 06-12-2013
older than dirt
dumber than dirt
scarcer than hens teeth
slicker than s**t on a pump handle
tighter than Dick's hatband
useless as tits on a bull
useless as buttons on a beer barrel
hot as a $2 pistol
[Reply]
jjirons69 11:33 AM 06-12-2013
Crazy as a $hithouse rat (can't believe I forgot that one)
Also used tight as Dick's hatband (just don't know where that one comes from, either)
Wound tight as an 8 day watch (my dad used to say that)
Hard as times in the 40s (he's said that a lot, too)
Rode hard and put up wet
[Reply]
MrClean 11:47 AM 06-12-2013
Slicker than snot
Like a monkey f'ing a football
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Blak Smyth 11:53 AM 06-12-2013
Like she was hit in the face with a hot sack of nickels
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ColdCuts 11:55 AM 06-12-2013
Crazy as a rat in a round room.
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
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mosesbotbol 11:56 AM 06-12-2013
Tougher than a 50 cent steak
All hat no cattle
A little sweet in the seat
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Garbandz 12:02 PM 06-12-2013
A face like a bag of door knobs
he looks like he got beat with an ugly stick
got an ass like a government mule
gonna beat you like a rented mule
[Reply]
kelmac07 12:30 PM 06-12-2013
Happy as a whore with a bag full of dildos.
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