MODS if this turns political please delete.
Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known
to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25
assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy
neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which
are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called
peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however,
it can be detected, because it impedes every action with which it
comes into contact.
A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would
normally take less than a second, to from four days to four years to
complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years; it
does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a
portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time,
since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons,
forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some
scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons
reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is
referred to as critical morass. When catalyzed with money,
Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just
as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but
twice as many morons.
