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General Discussion>Serious question
PeteSB75 07:24 AM 01-29-2009
I am considering shopping for a ring for my girlfriend. I know what cut and setting I will be getting, just unsure how much I should spend. 10% of annual income? Less? More? I just need a general ballpark and, to be blunt, don't trust jack s*#t I hear in jewelry stores.
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Blueface 07:26 AM 01-29-2009
Originally Posted by PeteSB75:
I am considering shopping for a ring for my girlfriend. I know what cut and setting I will be getting, just unsure how much I should spend. 10% of annual income? Less? More? I just need a general ballpark and, to be blunt, don't trust jack s*#t I hear in jewelry stores.
I would never view it as a % of what I earn.
Last time I bought an engagement ring was well over 28 yrs ago.
Would do it the very same way again.
Would buy what I can afford, what looks nice, what I think she will like and appreciate.
Screw what anyone says I should or should not spend.
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md4958 07:33 AM 01-29-2009
are you more concerned with the size of the ring or the quality of the stone?

How far are you from Springfield, MA? I would recommend the jewler I bought my stone from (I bought the stone first, and then had them make a band for it) I would guess that I saved about 40-50% of the "mall stores"

For an expenditure such as this it might be worth your while. PM me if you would like some more info.
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pnoon 07:36 AM 01-29-2009
Originally Posted by Blueface:
I would never view it as a % of what I earn.
Last time I bought an engagement ring was well over 28 yrs ago.
Would do it the very same way again.
Would buy what I can afford, what looks nice, what I think she will like and appreciate.Screw what anyone says I should or should not spend.
That says it all.
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dunng 07:37 AM 01-29-2009
Originally Posted by md4958:
How far are you from Springfield, MA?
New Haven area, right? :-)
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MedicCook 07:38 AM 01-29-2009
Don't go in thinking about how much you should be spending. Look at a lot of rings and get the best deal for the ring that she will like. More is not always better.
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mikeyj23 07:39 AM 01-29-2009
my opinion is get exactly what she wants - nothing else you buy (including a house) will be around as long as that ring.
Posted via Mobile Device
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Kreth 07:41 AM 01-29-2009
You know that whole percentage of salary BS is just marketing for the jewelry companies, right?
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ucla695 07:42 AM 01-29-2009
When I bought mine for my wife, I purchased the nicest ring I could afford and something that I knew she would like. :-)
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PeteSB75 07:54 AM 01-29-2009
Originally Posted by dunng:
New Haven area, right? :-)
Living in Stamford these days. I work in midtown manhattan, so was planning to hit the diamond district for some perusing, at least to start. I also checked out Bluenile.com. Not sure how prices on there compare to what I will get in a store. The mall is not happening. Anything I would find there tends to be extremely overpriced.

I guess I was just looking to make sure that I wasn't spending too little. I know how much I want to spend, and roughly what I want to get, so I guess we'll go from there and see what quality/size stone I can get. The markup on these things kills me though.
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RGD. 08:00 AM 01-29-2009
Originally Posted by Blueface:
Would buy what I can afford, what looks nice, what I think she will like and appreciate.
Yep.

And you know what - as for the rating of the diamond - unless you are a jeweler with a trained eye using one of those eye thinga ma jiggys - you can't tell and neither can anyone else. So unless you plan on selling it later, get a lower rated larger diamond. More bang for the buck.

You didn't mention - is this an engagement ring? If so, congrats!


Ron
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MedicCook 08:03 AM 01-29-2009
And if a woman puts the entire relationship on how big a ring she gets.... well it is usually not a good situation in the long run.
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md4958 08:09 AM 01-29-2009
Originally Posted by PeteSB75:
Living in Stamford these days. I work in midtown manhattan, so was planning to hit the diamond district for some perusing, at least to start. I also checked out Bluenile.com. Not sure how prices on there compare to what I will get in a store. The mall is not happening. Anything I would find there tends to be extremely overpriced.

I guess I was just looking to make sure that I wasn't spending too little. I know how much I want to spend, and roughly what I want to get, so I guess we'll go from there and see what quality/size stone I can get. The markup on these things kills me though.

I tried the diamond district with my uncle when I was looking with limited success. I went with my uncle who used to do a lot of business with these people. First issue I had was that these people all tried to sell me crap. I knew exactly what I wanted, and most of these places either didnt listen or didnt have the quality I was demanding. They kept showing me stones that were so crappy, I could see the flecks of black in there with my un-aided eye. (the stone I eventually bought was VVS2, Color F). If you go there make sure you know exactly what you want, as they WILL try to screw the uninformed customer.

The markup on diamonds is like 400-800%, depending on where you purchase it. I tried bluenile too, and found thier prices to be nothing great. I especially dislike the fact of not being able to hold the diamond and see it for my self before I bought.

The jewler I bought my diamond from actually put the stone in a scope, so I could see that it was the exact stone as the certifiacation (you could see the tiny tiny flaws were in the same spots and same shape).
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md4958 08:13 AM 01-29-2009
Originally Posted by RGD.:
Yep.

And you know what - as for the rating of the diamond - unless you are a jeweler with a trained eye using one of those eye thinga ma jiggys - you can't tell and neither can anyone else. So unless you plan on selling it later, get a lower rated larger diamond. More bang for the buck.

Ron
I respectfully disagree with Ron.

my wifes diamond makes most of her friends stones seem almost yellow, and it sparkles like no-other. I couldnt be happier that i decided to go with quality over size. For the price I paid I could have gotten her a 5 carat piece of crap, but I went with an as-close-to-flawless ( i could afford) 1.5 carat that looks enormous on her thin fingers.
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poker 08:13 AM 01-29-2009
You get the best that you can that fits in your budget. Thats the best advice I can give you, and given the current economic situation were all in I suggest you dont get in over your head when purchasing a ring. Remember, its all about what the ring symbolizes, not the size of the stone.
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SeanGAR 08:13 AM 01-29-2009
Diamonds are pieces of charcoal that look pretty. Let me be the first to introduce you to the wonder that is diamonique. Four out of five dentists can't tell that it is not real. Get it in a 6 prong solid platinum setting of course, not plated.

Image

I'm joking of course, my wife would beat me if I bought her a fake diamond .. and yours probably will too..

I bought a real diamond that wasn't exactly cheap. You want to look at diamonds in a bunch of stores, unset, and learn about what makes them different. Personally, I'd rather one that has a nice cut and is nice size over a smaller one that you can't see any flaw in at less than 20X. Cut = sparkle, and even though they may be the same basic cut, there are huge differences in how they look because diamond cutters are different and work with different pieces of carbon.

Have fun shopping.....
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mosesbotbol 08:14 AM 01-29-2009
Buy what you feel comfortable spending. Do not base it on any formula of income or salary- please do not do that!

As for an actual amount, hard to say. I would tell a prince one amount and pauper another...

Do yourself a favor, spend as little as it takes to get the job done. In the scheme of life, a ring is just a material token, your love for your girl is much beyond that. Bigger ring does not mean you love her more.

Any notion that you must sacrifice your salary or financial position (especially in these financially troubling times) to validate your commitment is spawned by the jewelry industry, no one else.
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Blueface 09:03 AM 01-29-2009
Oh, and one thing I forgot........
.......always a good thing to know how the state you live in interprets this "gift" should something not work out.
Hope all the best for you but best to be prepared.
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PeteSB75 09:14 AM 01-29-2009
Trust me, I won't be getting in over my head on this at all. I will be paying cash for whatever I get.

I have started doing some research on the subject, so I am at least somewhat familiar with the four c's. Cut is out of my hands. We talked about it a little and she let me know roughly what she wanted as far as cut and setting.

She said she'd be happy with a ring out of a gumball machine, so I'll probably get that too... But I want to get her something that I know she will love.

I wanted to go peruse at shops so I could see for myself, in person, what the difference in color and clarity really means in a set stone. How different the stones are to the naked eye.

And yes, this will be an engagement ring, but don't congradulate me until she's actually wearing the thing :-) That will probably be a few months. I'm just planning ahead.
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Raralith 10:25 AM 01-29-2009
As many have already said, buy what you can afford. And yes, you can tell a crappy diamond from a good one quite easily. A good quality will almost always be better than a big stone. Personally though, I know a lot of men fear going with their perspective wife ring shopping, but it really is the best way, in my opinion. Here are a few reasons:
1. You're perspective wife knows how much you make, and unless she's more about the rock than you, she'll be more realistic.
2. You never know what women think are beautiful. Never. Don't ever suspect, don't ever guess, and if you do, include a receipt (outside the realm of rings).
3. A ring always looks different on your woman compared to the jeweler trying to show you, on yourself, on a piece of plastic, or staring at it and imaging it on her hand. A ring for one woman doesn't neccessarily look good for another, and a ring like this is something your woman will look at forever. So get something she likes.

Also, my brother in law didn't buy the biggest stone, but when telling my mother, his line was "it's not the biggest, but with her pretty and petitie hands, it'll look big!" I thought that was rather cute.
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