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General Discussion>Best Man Speeches
Brutus2600 10:06 PM 09-06-2010
There is a ton of good advice here, I just have one tip of something NOT to do.

To this day, the worst speech I've ever heard and remember, was where they made the speech all about themselves and how awesome they were at helping the groom out with everything. Don't make it about you, make it about the bride and groom.

That's it :-)
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JE3146 10:49 PM 09-06-2010
I've given 2.

Keep it short, keep it sweet, keep it funny but not insulting. Compliment the bride in some way, even if you hate her. And if you don't know her that well, then say something to the effect that you can't wait to get to know her better.

The first one I thought up on the spot and went into unrehearsed, but I'm good at doing things like that. This one turned out more 'sweet' and produced the most crybabies in the audience, but I knew the couple very well.

The second I wrote out and practiced. I knew the groom for 15 years, but didn't know the bride very well. This one was more comedy focused purely because of how we grew up together. His mom came up to me afterwards and told me I could have been absolutely mean with that speech, but thanked me for keeping it tasteful and memorable.

If you have funny material, be aware of the backstory of people's families. Things you and the groom may have found funny through your years together, other people may find incredibly insulting. I had a 'bit' that I had to eliminate on the spot to prevent looking like an asshole due to things I witnessed while just looking around at the guests there. Any other day it would have been funny. But due to some attendees, it would have been tasteless.

Make sure to take note if the audience even has glasses in their hands or not. If it's just a speech, then end it with best wishes. If it's a toast, then end it with the whole "so raise your glass..." etc ending.

If you're not a public speaker, then try your best not to get nervous. Just think of it as a formal conversation with your friend and his new wife. Forget everyone else as best you can , but try your best to be aware of them and be sure to pause a bit for laughter. Also speak up. Everyone hates a speech they can't hear. Then above all stand up straight and deliver with confidence.

Sadly no one is going to remember your speech, especially not your friend, but you will. I don't remember the speeches that were given at my wedding, but I do remember to this day the exact words I said at my friends' weddings. So it will be something you live with, even if it isn't something they live with :-)

No pressure... good luck. :-)
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darkleeroy 10:56 PM 09-06-2010
Originally Posted by JE3146:
Sadly no one is going to remember your speech, especially not your friend, but you will.
We tend not to remember the good speeches, which is a shame. On the other hand, the bad ones, oh yea, we remember those.

I had a person during my wedding give a speech; his introduction being, "Thank you all for coming to my special day..." and ended without even acknowledging my wife. Needless to say, we remember that speech.
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JE3146 11:02 PM 09-06-2010
Originally Posted by darkleeroy:
We tend not to remember the good speeches, which is a shame. On the other hand, the bad ones, oh yea, we remember those.

I had a person during my wedding give a speech; his introduction being, "Thank you all for coming to my special day..." and ended without even acknowledging my wife. Needless to say, we remember that speech.
Fair point.

No one is going to remember it if it is good!

:-)

I was at a wedding when the best man said the groom's ex's name rather than his new bride's name. We remember that speech as well :-)
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yachties23 08:59 PM 09-23-2010
Thanks for the advice guys, all written, ready and armed. Hope it goes well.
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N2Advnture 08:36 AM 09-24-2010
Originally Posted by Samsquanch:
Keep it short, make them laugh and then make them cry.
Exactly...I made a Navy Seal cry at my brothers wedding (my first speech ever).
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Goldie 09:12 AM 09-24-2010
I just gave one in August for my brother's wedding. And I saw someone above mentioned short, sweet and to the point. And that is exactly right. When I got done with my speech the man of honor (yeah, you read that right), took over and totally put everyone to sleep because he just dragged on and on.

I went up to the bar afterwards to get a drink and the bartender complimented me by saying, "You had a good speech man, and believe me, I've sat through hundreds of these. You kept it short and to the point". That's what people want.

Hopefully he wasn't just blowing smoke up my ass, but I appreciated the compliment either way. And actually, this was my second best man speech for my brother. the first marriage was a sham. And not a sham-wow.
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N2Advnture 09:15 AM 09-24-2010
Originally Posted by Goldie:
I just gave one in August for my brother's wedding. And I saw someone above mentioned short, sweet and to the point. And that is exactly right. When I got done with my speech the man of honor (yeah, you read that right), took over and totally put everyone to sleep because he just dragged on and on.

I went up to the bar afterwards to get a drink and the bartender complimented me by saying, "You had a good speech man, and believe me, I've sat through hundreds of these. You kept it short and to the point". That's what people want.

Hopefully he wasn't just blowing smoke up my ass, but I appreciated the compliment either way. And actually, this was my second best man speech for my brother. the first marriage was a sham. And not a sham-wow.
Please post a copy of your speech to save me time writing one later, thanks :-)
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ucla695 09:30 AM 09-24-2010
Practice, practice, practice!

Also make sure to limit the number of drinks you have before the speech.

Good luck!
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ade06 10:31 AM 09-24-2010
Originally Posted by AD720:
Echoing some of the above.

- keep it short
- keep it sweet
- keep it about them and their relationship, not your escapades with the groom
- thank everyone for coming on the bride and groom's behalf (they may not have the chance to make that sort of announcement themselves and it was very appreciated when my best man did)
- thank the bride and/or groom's parents on all the guest's behalf

Good luck!
Make sure that they paid before thanking them for paying for the wedding. My best man thanked my father-in-law for paying for the weddding and the wonderfull receiption... He didn't pay for anything, in fact 4 years later, we're still paying for our wedding.
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clintgeek 12:49 AM 09-25-2010
I gave the speech at my little brother's wedding. If I may,:

Hello everyone, welcome. For those of you that don’t know me, my name is Clint. I’m the best man, Caleb’s older brother and Mom’s favorite.

I just want to thank everyone for being here. You’ve all helped to make today very special for these two. I know the love and gifts you’ve given will be remembered for a long time to come. I also want to thank the bridesmaids; you all look absolutely beautiful today.

As Caleb’s older brother we’ve had a lot of adventures together. I remember as kids we used to spend countless hours digging up our Papa's back yard looking for treasure. At one point we even buried his best hammer just so we could later claim it as bounty. We never found that hammer or any other treasure for that matter, but I’m glad to see that today Caleb has finally found his treasure.

I do have to say how lucky you are Caleb. You’ll leave here having gained a wife that is warm, loving and caring; a wife who is funny, and who radiates beauty where ever she goes.
And Melissa,
you're pretty lucky too
you leave here today having gained a, well,
a gorgeous dress and a beautiful bouquet of flowers.

Caleb, Melissa, I pray that your love is modern enough to get you through the day and old fashioned enough to get you through the years.

Everyone please stand and raise your glasses as we toast the new husband and wife,
Here’s to love, laughter,
And happily ever after!
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the new Mr and Mrs Crocker


It went beautifully. My best advice is not to get too raunchy. Remember, that girl is going to be your sister and her family is going to be your family. Best not to raise questions at this point. Leave out stories about Vegas, strippers and ex'es. Also, don't drink prior to the speech. I'm a drunk but I stayed sober until after the speech. It was well worth it.
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