I've been addicted to this site ever since crystal showed it to me. LOVE IT
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:-) Some hilarious stuff there!
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a couple of funny ones:
(810): oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a ****o

(480): I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.

(214): I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute

and one I have def sent myself in the past:
(970): Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
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been there, done that.....




:-)
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(415): Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events
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(503): PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
(515): Ur type is ready and willing
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(508): So how was he last night?
(617): Five-minute foot-long.
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(406): So, how was the dinner
(1-406): Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
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(205): Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
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(970): Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
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(310): I understand how i **** in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them :-)
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(208): i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
:-)
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:-):-):-)
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(315): covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly




hahahaha
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(419): I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to d!ck slap a girl.
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(212): ??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
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(709): i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
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ugh....now I'm addicted to it again....I can't stop
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Dude!

You're killin me with these!!!
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:-) :-) :-)
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