Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum Mobile
Jokes>The Jewish QB
AdamJoshua 01:46 PM 08-21-2014
The Bear's coach had put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears.

The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges
and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who
could ensure a Super Bowl win.

Then, one night while watching Fox News he saw a war-zone scene in the West
Bank . In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Israeli soldier with
a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story
window 100 yards away.

KABOOM!

He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.

KA-BLOOEY!

Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.

BULLS-EYE!

"I've got to get this guy!" Coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"

So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And
the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl.
The young man is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks
him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.

"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"

"I don't want to talk to you, the old woman says. "You are not my son!"

"I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. "I've won the
greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring
fans."

"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are
gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers
were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your
sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!"

The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,

"I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago.
[Reply]
nutcracker 01:58 PM 08-21-2014
:-)
[Reply]
Steve 02:13 PM 08-21-2014
:-):-)
[Reply]
The Poet 02:15 PM 08-21-2014
And I figured the punchline would involve getting the quarter back. :-)
[Reply]
dave 02:16 PM 08-21-2014
LOL!!! HA!!!

..."the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl".....LMAO
[Reply]
icehog3 02:43 PM 08-21-2014
I heard it with a hockey twist years ago, Nik Lidstrom and Detroit. It was lots funnier than this version.

:-) :-)
[Reply]
nutcracker 02:50 PM 08-21-2014
Originally Posted by icehog3:
I heard it with a hockey twist years ago, Nik Lidstrom and Detroit. It was lots funnier than this version.

:-) :-)
Only cause they're being mean about your great city.....
[Reply]
AdamJoshua 02:52 PM 08-21-2014
Originally Posted by icehog3:
I heard it with a hockey twist years ago, Nik Lidstrom and Detroit. It was lots funnier than this version.

:-) :-)
Please don't shoot!

:-)
[Reply]
Porch Dweller 02:54 PM 08-21-2014
:-)
[Reply]
icehog3 03:04 PM 08-21-2014
Originally Posted by nutcracker:
Only cause they're being mean about your great city.....
With a great hockey team. Remember what that was like? :-) :-)
[Reply]
jhedrick83 03:09 PM 08-21-2014
Sad thing is Rex Grossman popped into my head when I started reading the joke and there is nothing funny about Rex Grossman.

This could be the year though (seriously), GO BEARS!
[Reply]
RUNYYFan 03:52 PM 08-21-2014
:-)l :-)l :-)l

Very well-played.
[Reply]
Heavy_d 07:35 PM 08-21-2014
As a bears fan, :-):-):-)
[Reply]
longknocker 08:05 PM 08-21-2014
Originally Posted by dave:
LOL!!! HA!!!

..."the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl".....LMAO
I Remember When They Won All The Time. Back In "The Day".:-)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicago_Bears
[Reply]
The Poet 09:46 PM 08-21-2014
Originally Posted by longknocker:
I Remember When They Won All The Time. Back In "The Day".:-)

Yeah, but you and Mike Ditka are the only two who do . . . and I'm not so sure about Mike. :-)
[Reply]
CigarNut 09:49 PM 08-21-2014
:-) :-) (for the joke and the banter :-))
[Reply]
Ogre 10:27 PM 08-21-2014
:-):-):-):-):-)
[Reply]
Up