The PoDunk Zoo was famous for two things. Seven porpoises that has been living forever, and an old mangy lion that was so tame they just let it have the run of the grounds. The porpoises ate only seagulls, and one day the zoo ran out of them. The zookeeper had to rush two states over and pick up a few hundred seagulls and hurry back with them. When he got back, the old lion was laying across the entrance to the zoo, so he just drove around him and was immediately arrested for crossing the staid lion with gulls for immortal porpoises.
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Major League ace Mel Famey was pitching a gem on a 100#+ August afternoon, nursing a 1-0 lead into the 9th. The heat had taken its toll, and Famey drank down a couple beers out of sight in the dugout to cool down between innings. Under the influence on the mound, he walked 5 straight batters to lose the big game 2-1.
A couple opposing players found the empty cans in the other team's dugout. One showed them to his teammates, exclaiming, "This is the beer that made Mel Famey walk us".
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