A man came home early from work to find the mailman had his wife bent over the kitchen table.
"What is going on here?" he shouted.
"This was your idea," his wife protested. "Yesterday morning, when I told you that our mailman was retiring and said I wanted to do something special for him on his last day, you told me, 'Screw him.'"
(shamelessly stolen from Playboy's Party Jokes)
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