A family is at the dinner table.
The son asks his father,
"Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?"
The father, surprised, answers, "Well son, a woman goes through three
phases."
"In her 20's, a woman's boobs are like melons: round and firm."
"In her 30's and 40's, they are like pears: still nice, but hanging a
bit."
"After 50, they are like onions."
"Onions?"
"Yes. You see them, and they make you cry."
This infuriated his wife and daughter, so the daughter said,
"Mom, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?"
The mother, surprised, smiles and answers,
"Well dear, a man goes through three phases also."
"In his 20's, his willy is like an oak tree: mighty and hard."
"In his 30's and 40's, it's like a birch: flexible, but reliable."
"After his 50's, it's like a Christmas tree."
"A Christmas tree?"
"Yes --- dead from the base up, and the balls are just for decoration."
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