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Jokes>The family fun vacation of a lifetime
markem 07:14 PM 06-06-2009
The Ultimate Family Adventure Cruise


To The Point Cruise Line

is excited to offer the ultimate adventure cruise
along the pirate-infested coast of Somalia !

We board our luxury cruise ship in Djibouti on the Gulf of Aden near the
entrance to the Red Sea, and disembark in Mombassa , Kenya seven
adrenaline-charged days later.

Starting at $5,200 per-person (double occupancy, inside room) and $6,900
(veranda complete with bench rest), you'll relax like never before.

That's because you are welcome to bring your own arsenal with you. If you
don't have your own weapons, you can rent them from our onboard Master
Gunsmith. Enjoy reloading parties every afternoon with skeet and
marksmanship competitions every night!

But the best fun of all, of course, is Pirate Target Practice.

For the object of the cruise is to sail up and down the Somali Coast waiting
to get hijacked by pirates. The weapons rental costs are as follows.

Rent a full auto M-16 for only $25/day with ammo attractively priced at $16
per 100 rounds of 5.56 armor-piercing:

On a budget? Rent a full-auto scope-mounted AK-47 for only $9/day with 7.62
ball ammo at $12 per 100 rounds:

Hello! Nothing gets a pirate's attention like a Barrett M-107 50-cal sniper
rifle; only $59/day with 25 rounds of armor-piercing ammo affordably priced
at only $29.95.

Need a spotter? Our professional crew members can double as spotters for
only $30/hour (spotting scope included, but gratuities are not.)

Want to make a real impact? Rent an RPG for only $175/day with three
fragmentation rounds included!

Also included: Free complimentary night vision equipment - and throughout
the night, coffee, pastries and snacks are always available on the main deck
from 7pm until 6am.

Our deluxe package comes complete with gourmet meals and all rooms offer a
mini-bar.

But that's not all! Twin mounted miniguns are available for rental at only
$450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained fire!

We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by
pirates or you'll receive an instant $1,000 refund upon arrival in Mombasa.

How can we make that guarantee? We operate at 5 knots just beyond 12
nautical miles off the coast of Somalia , thus in international waters where
pirates have no rights whatever. In fact, we make three passes through the
area's most treacherous waters to ensure maximum visibility by Somali
"mother ships".

We repeat this for five days, making three complete passes past the entire
Somali Coast . At night, the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot
every five minutes with loud disco music directionally beamed shore side to
attract maximum attention.

Testimonials from previous participants in the Somali Cruise:

"Six attacks in 4 days were more than I expected. I bagged three pirates, my
wife nailed two, and my 12-year old son sank two boats with the mini-gun.
This wonderful cruise was fun for the whole family" -- Fred D., Cincinnati ,
OH

"Pirates 0, Passengers 32! Well worth the trip! Can't recommend it highly
enough!" -- Ben L., Bethesda , MD

"I haven't had this much fun since flying choppers in ' Nam . Don't worry
about getting shot by pirates... they never even got close to the ship with
the crap they shoot and their lousy aim... reminds me of a drunken juicer
door-gunner we picked up from the motor pool in Phu Bai!" -- Dan J. - Denver, CO

Come on board and bag your own clutch of genuine Somali pirates! But cabin
space is limited so you need to respond quickly. Reserve your package
before June 30th and get a great bonus - 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in
the caliber of your choice.

So sign up for the Ultimate Somali Coast Adventure Cruise now!
[Reply]
dunng 07:23 PM 06-06-2009
Sign me up! :-)
[Reply]
G G 07:31 PM 06-06-2009
I want in too.:-)
[Reply]
Thaplumbr 09:11 PM 06-06-2009
can we get a balcony near an elavator and the buffet?:-)
[Reply]
CBI_2 12:54 PM 06-07-2009
Are group rates available?
[Reply]
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