College student: "Hey, Dad -- I've got some great news for you!"

Father: "What, son?"

College student: "Remember that $500 you promised me if I made the Dean's list?"

Father: "I certainly do."

College student: "Well, you get to keep it!"
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Hah, now the Father needs to but some Scotch and Cigars.
[Reply]

Or pay for a tutor for his dillweed son......
[Reply]